By Amber C. Snider
Here are ways to make Valentine’s Day less about Hallmark and more about embracing your inner Venusian Goddess.
Valentine’s Day is swiftly approaching with Mercury still in retrograde, so things may seem a little tense or confusing when it comes to matters of the heart and communication. With the New Moon in Aquarius on February 11, you may find yourself questioning your existing relationship or singledom. But the cosmos is giving you time to reassess the ways you give and receive love, and perhaps most importantly, the ways you honor yourself.
Under Aquarius' airy, intellectual, empowering energy it’s a good time for new beginnings, introspection, and digging deep. It’s not all about romantic love with a "perfect partner" –– what if this journey is about cultivating and sustaining radical self-love?
Check in with your inner child.
Creating space for your emotions is key to a healthy spiritual life. Especially after this extra intense, heavy year. You know that baby-self that everyone has? The tiny child within us all that just wants to be loved and give love? With the New Moon in Aquarius, your dreamy, idealistic side is in a better position to make amends with your inner child in new, creative ways.
Try a 20 minute writing meditation and write an actual letter to your child-self. If you have trouble with this, imagine yourself as a toddler or a 4 year old –– what would you say to them? What would they have to say to you? Explore your/their needs, wants, desires, angers, disappointments ––aka start a dialogue on the page –– and listen to the answers you receive. Then write out positive affirmations as responses: “You are loved and protected. You are safe. You are a creative wonder and I cherish you. You’re doing just fine.” You wouldn’t say harsh and hurtful things to a child, so why would you do it to yourself? Nurturing that baby-child spirit within all of us is essential in radical self-love; plus it helps you recognize it in others.
Try Mediation incense as you channel your inner child with this writing exercise.
Try a Crystal Healing, Heart Chakra, or Empress Candle.
Sometimes before we can welcome in all that self-love, we have to do a bit of healing first. If you’re feeling blocked in love and dealing with old wounds from the past, a Crystal Healing candle (in pink or green) may be a great choice, as well as the Heart Chakra candle (more on that here). If you’re not feeling particularly blocked, but want to reign in and expand that bad ass Goddess aspect of yourself, the Empress candle is all about magnifying self-love and confidence, while also used for attracting romantic attention.
Spice up the bedroom.
Literally. Burn some cinnamon, Goddess of Love or Bad Ass incense to amp up those feel good, sexy vibes. Add a textured, faux-fur throw to your bed for the next couple weeks. Add a splash of vibrant red décor or wall hanging for some color magick. Burn a Catch A New Love candle for 7 days. Or try these tips on how to invite more sexual energy to your bedroom.
“Language is...an intellectual recreation.”
Yes, oh thank you great Gertrude Stein. With the New Moon in Aquarius, a little word play fun is great for spellwork, especially when it comes to experimenting with new chants or even automatic writing. Everything doesn’t have to be so serious –– sometimes your inner child (yes, back to that) just wants to play.
Mix up words (even if they don’t seem to make sense) and brainstorm new silly rhymes. When we give ourselves the freedom to explore and play creatively, without censorship or judgement, we can tap into our inner artist and creator within. Who knows, maybe you’ll even come up with inspiration for a larger project down the road.
Burn or wear Inspiration oil or Divine Muse as you experiment with your word play or automatic writing.
Get crafty. It’s called witchcraft for a reason.
Remember back in the day when all it took was a handmade Valentine card with a couple of Smarties from your crush to send your heart racing? Or how making Valentine’s cards for your classmates was, like, a thrill? Creating things with our hands not only keeps the mind busy and eases tension, but there’s a subtle joy in it. This week, try a new hobby as a gift to yourself –– maybe that means you try candle carving, making your own incense, weaving a basket, or meditative calligraphy. Whatever it is, you’ll pick up a new skill and have a little self-care token as a result.
Self-care is not selfish.
That’s right, let’s say it again: self-care is not selfish. If you’re single on Valentine’s Day or things aren’t going quite as you planned, don’t panic –– embrace that beautiful, luscious, vibrant Goddess of Love within and keep it moving. It doesn’t have to be a full-on Venusian ritual, but simply soaking in a tub full of fresh or dried rose petals, anointing your body with fragrant oils (here), or doing a full self-care routine (as in, thoroughly washing your hair, putting on that face mask that’s been sitting in the bathroom drawer for 2 months, spraying your favorite perfume, and changing into fresh clothes) can be a real mood boost. “As above, so below...as within, so without.”
For more stories on love, check out this article on the symbolism of the rose.